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Tuesday, 17 November 2009

Things Heard About The School

I think everyone is familiar with things like this. Walking through a crowded hallway, one is bound to hear a single line of conversation that he/she wishes he/she knew more about. I've compiled a list of such quotes, and posted them here for others' enjoyment. Also included are lines from conversations around the lunch table. (Please note- all names have been shortened to a single letter for privacy of those involved.)
*after a miniature food fight* "...You want a muffin?"
"I really wish 'fuck you' was a valid response to my math test."
"Do you want to be my human sacrifice?"
*after watching about 1/3 of a German movie (Martha)* "The baby was pregnant!"
"What's E drawing?" (This later turned into whether or not the subject was from Aliens vs Predators, which it wasn't.)
"Is Tails [from Sonic the Hedgehog] a chick or a dude?"
"T OWNED B!" (Both T and B were suspended later that day for fighting on school grounds.)
"A is a hypocrite/A keeps messing around in E's love life!"
"Confusing J [E's ex] is fun..."
*after finding out that E is using a fake boyfriend to convince J/the stalker to leave her alone* "E's going out with WHO now?!"
*in reference to a sugar cookie* "You're eating your cousin!"
"My kneecap just popped out; is that normal?"
"I am a human, not a sandwich."
"Harry Pika and the Quest for the Magical Leopleurodon!"
"M's new nickname is Crazy Bumblebee, okay?"

Friday, 09 October 2009

What's your favorite horror or Halloween movie?

The Nightmare Before Christmas is without a doubt the first that comes to mind. Yes, it's Disney (okay, and Tim Burton and many other awesome people). Yes, it's stop-motion animation. But it's AWESOME!

I mean, come ON!
Walking, talking skeletons, zombies, and all those Halloween critters we love... and who could forget the epic songs? Kidnap the Sandy Claws, This is Halloween... best. Ever.
Of course, this is all my own opinion.
Link here for the beginning of the movie ^^

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Saturday, 26 September 2009

School

Well, after a month of school- one month of 9th grade survived!-, I just figured I'd post things I've noticed about UHS. Though they're numbered, these items really don't have any particular order.
(Disclaimer- all pictures used were found on Google Images, not taken by me. I don't own them.)
1. The 'aisleway' phenomenon.
It's not visible in this picture, but there is a strange tendency within the hallways of UHS. As normal, students will travel in two distinct streams through a hallway, moving in opposite directions. However, there is something I have dubbed the 'aisleway phenomenon'. These streams will create an aisleway (or two) within said walking path. If in a hallway, it is two clear aisles along the sides of the hallway, visibly unobstructed yet unused.When on a staircase, the aisles combine into one main aisleway between the streams. For unknown reasons, I seem to be the only one taking advantage of this phenomenon.
2. The staircase problem.

There are many staircases throughout UHS, to easily traverse between the three floors. However, main staircases- staircases wider than others- are placed stretegically at key points throughout the school. Because they are easily accessible from most areas, they are commonly used. 'Side' staircases, therefore, should be used at all costs, to avoid traffic jams. So the reasoning goes. However, there are a few students who assume that everyone follows such logic, and assume that they will be 'intelligent' and use the supposedly now-abandoned main staircases. At least, they thought they were few. In reality, they are one of multitudes, adding to the traffic jam. And so, the side staircases remain unused- and blissfully empty to the few who actually use them.
3. Scheduling problems.
Every student in the school seems to have a complaint or five to make about their schedule. Lunch is too early, lunch is too late, classes on the other side of the school, and so on. The most pervasive grievance is the accursed Mad Dash for the opposite floor. See, UHS has three floors- A, B, and C, lowest to highest- in addition to trailer 'mod' classrooms, accessible from either A or B floor due to elevation differences in outdoor terrain. By senior year, most just grin and bear it, but underclassmen continually gripe about this. An example of said schedule (which, by the way, is my current plan): Mod(A)-A-C-C-A-Mod(B)-A-C-A. Such racings about, in addition to packed staircases, make for many late students.
And such are my observations on school thus far... perhaps I'll go to homecoming in two weeks and post about that ;)

Monday, 27 July 2009

Things Emmett Cullen is Not Allowed To Do (Part 2)

Figured it was about time I got another of these out... hehe, sorry, lost the list for a while. Anyways.
1. Forcefully dress Carlisle in a disco suit...
2. Then ask him if Barry Manilow knows he raided his wardrobe.
3. Steal all of Bella's bras...
4. Then wear the raciest one to school over his clothes...
5. And claim he did it to make a statement about gender stereotypes.
6. Pants Edward as he's walking to class...
7. Especially n front of a crowd of lust-filled girls.
8. Refer to Esme as "the Stepford Wife."
9. Claim to have had wild and crazy s*x with Edward's piano
10. Claim to have had wild and crazy s*x with Edward's car
11. Claim to have had wild and crazy s*x with Edward's girlfriend (Bella)
12. Claim to have had wild and crazy s*x with Edward
13. Claim any of numbers 9-12 loudly in the cafeteria
14. Refer to Jasper's empathy as "Jasper's feminine problem"
15. Paint Alice's 911 Turbo a color other than yellow
16. Ask Rosalie if she thinks he needs a breast reduction so his chest will be smaller than hers
17. Tell anyone who listens that there really is a Voldemort...
18. And that his real name is Aro Volturi
19. Officially declare the third Saturday of every month "Seduce Carlisle Day"
20. Threaten to exsanguinate anybody who annoys him with his "vampire fangs"
21. Repeatedly sing "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts" using items such as Edward's ego, Alice's butt, Bella's klutziness and Jasper's sensitivity as the size of the last coconut
22. Call Debussy "elevator music" in front of Edward
23. Hold Alice's favorite pair of shoes over her head so she has to jump for them
24. Tell everyone that he's pregnant...
25. And the baby's Esme's
26. Call all Texans a bunch of hicks in front of Jasper
27. Wear Rosalie's makeup and clothes to school...
28. Then fake sob and tell the guidance counselor that he feels like his family is pressuring him to be with Rosalie, and that he's unsure of his sexuality and who he really is.
29. Sing "No Sleep Tonight" when Edward leaves to go watch Bella sleep
30. Call Alice a munchkin and offer her a lollipop for being such a cute little girl
31. Hum the Jaws theme song whenever Alice walks by
32. Start yelling the lyrics of Kelly Clarkson's "Txt Message Break Up" at Edward randomly, while pretending Edward actually broke up with him and it's not a song
33. Tell the NSA he heard Carlisle make a threat on the President's life
34. Ask little girls in a creepy voice if they like puppies
35. Pretend to fall asleep in class...
36. And then pretend to be having a wet dream in which Jasper is the star...
37. Especially when Jasper is sitting in the desk next to his.
38. Dye his hair blonde...
39. Then tell everyone blondes really do have more fun
40. Imagine Bella naked in Edward's presence just to annoy him
41. Paint mustaches on all of Carlisle's paintings of people
42. Replace all of Esme's cleaning supplies with paint
43. Start a Vampires Anonymous group...
44. And invite all the goth and emo kids in the school to join
45. Sing "I'm Too Sexy"
46. Dance to "I'm Too Sexy"
47. Speak only in third person for days
48. Sob hysterically at lunch about how fat he is, and announce he's going on a diet.
49. Write things such as "Prada is 4 prudes" and "Dolce&Gabbana is crap" all over Alice's school books
50. Tell Bella's friends that Bella and Edward are both into really kinky exhibitionist stuff and that's why they're soooo perfect for each other
"Well, that's everything for part two, I suppose," Alice said as she scanned the list.
"Not like it'll make much difference," Bella commented. She, Alice and Rosalie sat close together around the dining room table in the Cullens' house.
"Still, it makes Esme feel better to see the lists mounted in the living room. My husband. Honestly. He acts like he's seven instead of seventy," Rosalie replied as she put the finishing touches on her manicure. Bella and Alice nodded in agreement.
The three stood and headed into the living room. Alice took the list and taped it to the wall; the three girls stood back and looked at it.
"Well, what do you guys want to do now?" Bella asked. Alice opened her mouth, and was about to answer when Emmett came rushing through the front door with a large object wrapped in a blanket.
"Alice! Thank goodness you're here- I need to hide the nuclear warhead before the feds arrive!"
"Dear God," Bella said.
"YOU STOLE A NUCLEAR WARHEAD?!" shrieked Rosalie.
"I was improving it!" Alice grabbed his arm and ran with him outside, presumably to show him a place where no one could find the warhead. Bella and Rosalie stood in shocked silence fir a moment before Bella sighed, turned to the list, and scrawled at the bottom:
51. Steal nuclear warheads to improve them. Correction: he is not allowed to steal anything, including but not limited to government property, underwear, kitchen utensils and cheese wheels.

Wednesday, 08 July 2009

What is one color that you absolutely dislike and why?

Pink, just because it's been forced on me so much. It's the stereotypical 'girly' color, and I, being the first female grandchild, have gotten truckloads of pink dumped on me. I. Do. NOT. Like. Pink.
(Yellow and orange are close seconds for the same reason)

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